Ze Relationship Zeries #3: Letter From The Dominatrix

Oct 29, 2011 by

You know who she is, dontcha? It’s Jessica Zafra.

This I say unto you: ASK HIM OUT.

Gays are still guys, you know, despite disputable claims that some of them are women trapped in men’s bodies. Heterosexual guys can become fast friends by just talking about sports even though they have nothing much in common. If they like each other, they are instant friends. The same principle applies to gays. After one good conversation or good sex, the two parties can decide that they are a couple.

If he accepts your sudden and unprovoked invitation to coffee or wherever you are planning to take him, it means that he is interested. If he declines, you are not his type. If he declines but asks for your number, he is interested. There is really no sleuthing around when it comes to gay relationships. If the guy says he likes you, he likes you. If he says otherwise, move on to the next guy. There is no need to look for subtext here. Take everything at face value. After all, it’s between guys and most guys are direct and blunt about these things.

The “league” factor is a big deal I must say (read: classifying people into “superiors” versus “inferiors” — ed). Guys are also innately competitive and there’s definitely the tendency to make the other feel inferior. The “I’m bigger” attitude is there. But you’ll never know unless you ask him out. It’s the to know if you have a chance.

I think the indicator of a good homosexual relationship is that there is a give-and-take cycle going on—a symbiotic relationship (bayotic, get it?). Both guys are deriving satisfactory benefits from one another. However, if one is doing all the work while the other just lies there, something is wrong. Somebody is taking advantage of the other. It’s already a parasitic relationship.

Yours truly,
Auntie Janey

The warblers' syndrome. Photo from http://glee.wikia.com

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