How To Run A Full Marathon

Dec 10, 2011 by bobby

Day 1

1. Ze road manager says we have to be out of the hotel in 30 minutes. Rule number one: follow ze road manager. Rule number two: follow ze road manager. Rule number three: there are no other rules. So shut up.

Ze Road Manager.

2. Take a cab to Orchard Road and have Hainanese Chicken for lunch.

3. Get your race kits at Marina Bay Sands.

The humongous hall where you claim your race kits.

4. Walk around, shop, eat again at Marina Bay Sands.

This was the picture taken by a drunk guy.

5. Ze road manager buys bananas, eggs, feta cheese, peking duck, roast pork and rice for dinner and pre-race breakfast.

6. Go back to your hotel, watch TV, and have dinner by 7:00. Don’t forget bananas for dessert.

7. Check your gears. Running suit, socks, shoes. Lube and plasters. Gel, powerbars, and salt tabs.

8. Get into zen mode. Sleep by 8:30. If you’re having trouble sleeping take Advil TM.

Day 2

Wake up at 2:45 A.M.
Eat a banana with peanut butter and soft boiled eggs prepared by ze road manager.
Drink coffee. Half a cup, extra bold. Starbucks never fails.
At 4:00 A.M. ze road manager announces taxi is waiting downstairs.
Be at the Orchard Road starting line before gunstart. Go over the fence if you get stuck.

6. Pray and start running with 20,000 runners in the full marathon category.

7. Throw away paper cups, banana peels packs of gels and powerbars. This is the only day where you can litter in Singapore without getting fined. And yes, take a leak behind the bushes. The marshals told us, “it’s a bush not a toilet”. What the heck!

8. Pray again. They say runners usually hit the wall at the 30th kilometer. This means they stop. Dead tired. Or plain dead. We run up to the 28th kilometer. We walked to the 30th. When we got to the 31st, we started laughing and running. By then your legs get to have a mind of their own. The wall is a myth. At 34 kilometers, we knew it was only a matter of time when we get to cross the finish line.

9. Finish line at 10:30. Get the medal.

10. Go back to your hotel, soak your feet in ice for 30 minutes prepared by ze road manager.

With Gus Banusing soaking it up for 30 minutes.

11. Take a hot shower.

12. Out for lunch in 30 minutes because ze road manager (again) says so.

13. For lunch, have more peking duck and prawn dumplings.

14. Shop. Never mind the line at Chanel. It’s the last day of the big sale. The ever snooty LV does not have sale in its vocabulary.

15. Go back to your hotel and sleep for about 2 hours.

16. Party by 9:30. Drink and smoke.

17. Go to a club at 1:30 A.M. and dance on the ledge for 2 more hours.

18. Go back to your hotel at 4:00 A.M. Sleep soundly. No interruptions.

Day 3

1. Ze road manager announces breakfast at the hotel dining area ends at 9:30. We rush downstairs. By the time we get there, ze road manager has breakfast ready. Ze road manager is a sprinter. As marathoners we may have conquered 42 kilometers, but in this instance we fall second in line to the sprinter.

2. After breakfast, pack up and shop some more.

3. Ze road manager says it doesn’t matter where we go as long as we’re back in the hotel by 4:30P.M.

4. Go to the airport, fly home and think: 42km is the new 21.

Life is wonderful. Pauline Banusing is ze best road manager in the world. Don’t argue unless you’ve run 42 kilometers and have done days 1 – 3.